Friendly Skies, Part II
As promised, here are the other five ways we can all help return civility to the airways!
6. Especially on long flights, we should all get up and take a brief stroll up and down the cabin. In fact, the airlines recommend a quick stretch every hour or so to help avoid the development of blood clots in leg veins. When getting up or sitting down, avoid pulling up or balancing on the seat in front of you. One little unintentional yank on your part will, at best, shake your fellow passenger, and at worse, may send his or her beverage flying.
7. Let's address sharing. In their infinite wisdom, the airlines have opted to place the very minimum number of arm rests throughout most of their planes. In a typical row, three people, with a total of six arms, compete for four arm rests. When seated, we all have an absolute obligation to share this precious space. Gentlemen, I recognize there is something in your biological make-up that practically requires you to occupy territory. However, as long as you are on an airplane, give it up. Some of us, mostly women travelers, are getting just a wee bit tired of snuggling tight into our middle seats while the big guys who surround us claim all four arm rests.
8. With the airlines continuing to reduce their food and beverage service (would you believe this morning I was offered a granola bar . . . in First Class!?!?!?), more passengers are opting to bring their own meals on board. If you choose to picnic on board, please be sensitive to the possibility of stinking up an entire airline cabin. Let's face it, some foods are just plain odiferous. Stinky cheese, fish, anything with lots of garlic or onions, all should probably be reserved for dining at home. By the way, I thought a riot might ensue the day a bunch of us dashed from one plane to another--no break for a snack--only to encounter a fellow flyer already on board nibbling away at a cheese pizza. It made me remember my 3rd grade teacher, who upon discovering that I was chewing gum, asked, "And, do you have enough to share with everyone in class?"
9. Your time on board an airplane is neither the appropriate time nor place to undertake a major personal grooming initiative. Please do not trim your finger, and I suppose I should mention, toe nails. Please do not spend a flight cleaning your inner ear. And, please, please, please do not spend a flight identifying and attacking those places on your body where dead skin has accumulated.
10. Once your flight has safely landed, grab your luggage and deplane as quickly as possible. If for whatever reason, you are seated in Row 12 and your luggage is stored above Row 22, wait for Rows 13 through 22 to empty before you attempt to swim up stream. On your way out, make an effort to thank the pilot and crew. After all, they've managed to take a tube of relatively thin metal filled with flammable liquid and hurl you through space safe and sound to your next destination.
Here's to friendlier skies through the remainder of 2005!
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